I learned about Wail Alselwi, co-owner of a Staten Island, N.Y. deli, in a social media reel. I was fascinated by what the children chose as part of their prize for their great grades but for those unfamiliar with Alselwi’s initiative, Grades for Grabs at Zack’s Finest Deli & Grocery, here’s a quick description.

Joseph Lamour interviewed Alselwi, whose nickname is “Island Ock,” for today.com. He wrote “students who earn an average of 80 — 90% are awarded whatever they want from the store, and those who get between 70 — 80% can take home $10 worth of items. Students with lower grades who show improvement also get goodies, and the same goes for kids with perfect attendance or who are awarded student of the month.

“If a kid gets 90% or higher, he offers them their pick of goodies from the store, as well as a $100 bill and a T-shirt.” Children who see the videos, mostly on TikTok, have come from as far as Pennsylvania.

In Google I learned that at first he was “paying everything out of his own pocket. His brother Nashwan started a GoFundMe page because people wanted to help, and it has now raised over $330,000 to reward kids for working hard in school.”

His three children live in Yemen. He told Lamour, ““I got my own back home, and I miss them, so it makes me happy to see other kids happy. I see my own kids in front of me.”

Back to what the children he invites to take anything they want. Their pile often includes a dozen eggs and a gallon of milk. Some hardly take anything and he urges them to grab more. Others choose a lot of chips and crisps and some gum and funny colored drinks. A few ask for a meal such as chicken and rice.

The children are polite, and all say thank you. He praises them as he carefully reviews and makes comments about their grades or improvement out loud. I think that the big winners love the $100 bill and the goodies but their expressions as he studies their report cards—some on their phones, others on paper—or acknowledges their special awards for attendance, tells me they like the recognition the best.

People like Wail Alselwi warm my heart. Can you share examples of similar amazing people?

   

First, my apologies to the Deborahs, Debs, Debbys and Debbies I know. This is definitely not about you.

On to the topic.

My mother would have died a billionaire if she’d been given $1.00 for every time she’d say to me, “Anything else?” tired of a litany of my complaints and worries. Fortunately for friends and family–and thanks to mom–these days I try to neutralize/balance bad news or updates during tough times with something cheerful so that when they see my text or my number on their phones, they don’t fear reading my message or picking up my call. For example, I might share a discovery of a compelling series on Netflix. Or ask if they heard about Astoria, the wild turkey who has roamed Manhattan and Queens since last year.

We all have our bad–even tragic—stretches. But some folks always walk around with a dark cloud overhead. I imagine a dust storm similar to the one around the sweet Peanuts character Pigpen only moved upwards. Negativity shows on their faces which is a shame because it can transform an attractive person into an almost ugly one. A friend mentioned a colleague who corners her with countless grievances. The person’s constant grumps and groans are unappealing.

I recently attended a glorious gathering with scrumptious food and lively conversation by all but one. Perhaps she didn’t read the room. We were having a good time, and her negativity didn’t fit. It was an intrusion like an off-key instrument among the spot-on ones in a perfect orchestra.

What are gentle ways to steer the conversation of a chronic grouch to positive territory?

   

I often wonder who approves some projects. Could all the graphic and interior designers, architects and their clients/bosses be 30-something or younger?

Escalation

A spry nonagenarian friend plans to invite some friends to meet her at the Peacock Alley Bar in the Waldorf Astoria Hotel, recently reopened after a hiatus of almost eight years. The landmark received a thorough remodeling.

Light fare at Peacock Alley—caviar and seafood, refined bites and dessert–is served from 11:00 a.m. to 11:00 p.m.

Main entrances to the hotel are on Park and Lexington Avenues. My friend tells me that there are only stairs to access the lobby, more on Lexington Ave than the Park Ave side. [There was an escalator on Lex in the original building.] I dropped by to speak with the doorman. He immediately offered to show me to a hidden elevator. He seemed to be the only one on duty. As we spoke a guest arrived with suitcases. He dashed to help the man. But what if he’d been with me locating the hidden elevator? Was the guest supposed to mount the stairs with his luggage?

Prices are such that I suspect many of the hotel’s potential customers will be old enough to be daunted by the stairs if they are in too much of a rush to find the elevator. At any age, try mounting and descending a waterfall of steps in a floor-length evening gown and heels.

Buzzzzzzz

I bought a flying insect trap. Yes, Virginia, the little buggers reach the 27^th Floor. The instructions for where and how to install the sticky part are in 6 point tiny type. Really?

Say What?

I’ve already mentioned this gripe both here and to the membership office of a major NYC museum about the type on some captions/museum labels. It is too small, especially in rooms darkened to protect textiles and paper. The color contrasts can also be daunting—white on gray for example. Placement near the floor is a challenge for older information-hungry patrons as well.

Groan

Waiting rooms in some doctor’s offices look fabulous. Trouble is the furniture is too low and/or has no arms, which means patients of a certain age might best stand until their turn comes as a graceful exit from a sofa or chair is impossible. Maybe it’s a signal: If you can’t get up, we don’t want you as a patient.

The front doors of the last few offices I rented locked shut by turning a key an inch or two from the floor. Last one out had the honor. Phew!

Some 55 million people in the U.S. are 65+. How do such design decisions happen? Can you add to these examples?

   

It’s forbidden for tenants to have a doorbell camera/video doorbell in my apartment house. I imagine people who hire dog walkers or babysitter/nannies want to confirm how long their dog was exercised and make sure baby was properly clothed when taken for a stroll. Not sure why they are forbidden in public hallways if pointed to a particular door, but so be it.

Nanny cams inside the apartment and dog or child trackers used outside would also do the trick. Door staff here are pretty good at security.

Years ago we fell for a bill of goods about a Culligan water softening system right after we’d bought a house. The rep installed a gizmo which staff was supposed to refill and maintain. He knew we were weekenders. The details are fuzzy now, but we stopped the charade when we realized the only thing they did after the first or second visit was to send a bill. We could have used a camera in this instance though they didn’t exist then for private homes.

The inspiration for this post was a friend’s similar experience with Terminix which “does an exclusion and termite service bi-annually here,” she texted. “This is outside service, and I don’t have to be home. Also, I have cameras!,” she wrote.

“The tech came the other day, rang the doorbell twice, waited 2 minutes and got into his truck and drove away. A couple of hours later I get a text saying my service is complete.”

She continued, “I called customer service and the employee didn’t care and said she would reschedule my appointment for free!

“I told customer service they should train their techs to look for cameras, walk around the house and at least pretend to do their jobs.”

My friend rescheduled with same tech in a week when she would be home. “Can you imagine if they charge me for the last visit!  I would be canceling this service contract.”

I thought, “even worse, can you imagine if she didn’t have cameras and if her house became overwhelmed by termites?”

The termite inspector came as rescheduled and did his job. My friend was a good sport and at the end of the visit suggested that in future he look out for cameras.

Obviously, the cameras would be lifesavers to catch the culprits if packages were disappearing from your front door and to ID the creatures that are munching your flowers. What else?

Do you have a doorbell camera/video doorbell or cameras outside your home or apartment?

   

Pope Leo XIV met with Hollywood actors and directors on Saturday. They included Cate Blanchett, Alison Brie, Dave Franco, Adam Scott, Spike Lee, Chris Pine and George Miller.

In this context, a few days before, he named four of his favorite movies during an interview with Variety: “It’s a Wonderful Life, 1946,” “The Sound of Music, 1965,” “Ordinary People, 1980,” and “Life Is Beautiful, 1997.” [All but “It’s a Wonderful Life” won Oscars.]

Edward Segarra, USA Today, quoted a statement from the Vatican that the Pope “has expressed his desire to deepen dialogue with the world of cinema … exploring the possibilities that artistic creativity offers to the mission of the Church and the promotion of human values.” [A little stuffy but….]

“Casablanca,”1942, and “Brief Encounter,” 1945, headed my husband’s list of favorites.

And some of mine? “Roman Holiday, 1953,” “Breakfast at Tiffany’s,” 1961, “The King’s Speech,” 2010, “Moonstruck,” 1987, “Uncle Buck,” 1989, “A little Romance,” 1979, “Arthur,” 1981, “Philomena,” 2023, “An Affair to Remember,” 1957, and “Good Morning Vietnam,” 1987.

I hardly–if ever–go to the movies anymore. I fear it’s a habit a lot of people have dropped. I see a bunch at home, mostly on Netflix, PBS or TCM.

What are some of your favorite films? Will movie houses survive?