Well it’s astonishing that half of January has passed already. We have fasted and the Summit registration went live. Already registrations are rolling in from Florida, New Zealand, Michigan, Washington DC, Minnesota, Nevada, Australia, and a few more places.
Oh, I’m so hopeful you can be here. This is going to be the Family Reunion/Family Summit of a lifetime! Here is the link to register, Hear The Roar. Here is the link to the Facebook Travel Group.
I’ve pondered over what to write about in the last few weeks. And sometimes I think I’ve said all I have to say about marriage to a pre-believer. However, I know that there are new readers arriving who haven’t walked this unique marriage path for the number of years as I have and because of that, I want write about the basics again.
For those of you who have been married to your spouse for more than 20 years, I’m asking you to add your experience, wisdom and encouragement to the discussions. Please take time to read the posts and share your thoughts. Your love and voice is needed to encourage some young wife sitting at her kitchen table, ready to throw in the towel. (That was me once.)
So, let’s talk about Marriage Killers.
In the next several post I’m going to share the top marriage killers. I’m asking the community to share your thoughts in the comments. Perhaps these posts will turn into a book one day that will help the next generation. So please share.
CONFLICT OVER MONEY
Fights about spending, credit card debt, and financial over commitment are the fuel to crash and burn a marriage.
Mike and I are fortunate because this is ONE area where we agree. It’s likely due to my many years as a banker, (I worked for 25 years in corporate America as a banker. I retired a Vice President/Lending Manager after starting as a bank teller as a teenager.) I gained an appreciation for financial restraint and a strong sense of responsibility over my checkbook. (I could be fired from my job if I bounced a check. I needed my job!)
Mike gained his financial accountability from his years as a starving college student. But what if you weren’t taught to budget? What if you grew up and mom and dad who virtually gave you whatever you wanted? Or what if spending and saving were not taught, talked about, nor modeled?
Destructive conflict with regard to finances in a marriage is where there are two spenders and a tit-for-tat attitude by both.
He says, “If she spends that much, then I will too.”
She thinks: If he is spending his paycheck like that, then I’m going to do the same.
Similar conflict exists where one spouse is responsible but the other lacks financial responsibility and disrespects the values of the saver.
Examples exist on both sides of the sexes. A husband drives home a new truck to an astonished and heartbroken wife who is saddled with a car payment they can’t afford and was not included in a large financial decision. OR a wife continues to spend on the credit card even when her husband points out they aren’t making a dent in paying it down.
In the Donovan home, throughout our entire marriage I have handled the checkbook, bank accounts, filed the tax returns and managed most of our money decisions. The stress of meeting obligations has weighed heavily upon me. This is true of every person who handles the money for the marriage. There were years where we lived paycheck-to-paycheck and I worried how and when to purchase groceries, pay the insurance or balance the bills.
And before my marriage, there were weeks I would pay the bills as a single mother and have $25 left for gas to get me to work for two weeks. Scary. But by the grace of God.
However, I always found a way to get the bills paid and I forced myself into restraint. That doesn’t mean that I didn’t splurge in certain circumstances. I did. But not outside of what I could afford.
So, SUMites it’s tax season. It’s time to talk finances with your spouse. If you are walking on eggshells over your money, it’s time to visit Dave Ramsey and get yourself out of debt. It’s time to take control of your finances and bring peace into your lives. It will be difficult at first but becoming financially free from debt and the constant stress of financial pressure will release an enormous freedom over your marriage.
Start with prayer. God cares a great deal about our money. There are over 500 verses in the Bible about money and 40% of Jesus’ parables deal with money. Ask the Lord to help you. Ask the Lord for supernatural provision. I could share several stories about when I needed money or provision and the EXACT amount came into my hands within the week.
But, God also expects his people to have self-control (gift of the Spirit). So ask for, and exercise, self-control and make a commitment together with your spouse about how and when to spend money. Talk about the boundaries that need to be set if one or the other oversteps this commitment.
Ask God for the money to get to the conference. I can’t wait to hear your story when it shows up.
Alrighty, what is your story about marriage and money? I’ll see you in the comments. Hugs, Lynn
I've been praying about what to write this week after our wonderful communal fast. I'm sure you're still reflecting on it as I am. Anyway, a phrase has kept coming to me for today's post, and it's this:
One of the most important things you can do, in your place of commissioning, is receive God's love.
This phrase is one that I've been carrying around for a while now. It was spoken to me by a visiting pastor who I met briefly at a university student gathering organized by some campus missionaries. At this gathering, he went person by person round the room and spoke a blessing over each of us. There were at least thirty of us, so it was a labor of love to give such personalized prayers despite not knowing any of us. It took a couple of hours and we all listened intently to each prayer. When it was my turn he paused in silence and then said:
"I seem to feel that you are surrounded by those who have very comfortable lives. In this 'comfortable' place you're going to help a lot of people - but you're going to have to be out of your comfort zone to get into their zone. It's humanitarian work."
"Too right," I thought to myself, thinking of how deeply uncomfortable I am living in a place where atheism surrounds me. But to see it as humanitarian work? That put a different lens on it. Then, the pastor finished with this:
"The main thing you must do, to make sure you don't get weary, is receive God's love. Just focus on receiving His love, and you're not going to get weary."
Ever since that day I've been chewing on what it looks like to deliberately receive His love. I'd be interested to hear your thoughts on this too.
One thing I started doing, after receiving that pastor's wisdom, was to look back on the year each December, re-read my journals, and jot down moments where I experienced God's love. I would reflect on what those moments told me about how God perceives me, and I would write it up into a testimony with the heading 'How God has loved me this year'. These beautiful write-ups are things I pull out and read often.
That's one way I receive God's love; but another idea might be to meditate on 1 Corinthians 13 and think about what those features mean for my relationship with Him. He is, for example, patient and kind with me, is not easily angered by me, hopes and bears all things when it comes to me, rejoices in truth around my life, and more.
It's perhaps easier to focus on what we are to do - love others, and love God (Matthew 22:37-39; James 1:27) - than it is to sit back and receive; but like any kind of love relationship the giving and receiving go hand in hand. Hebrews 4:11, for example, tells us just how important it is to enter the rest of receiving Jesus Christ, and when we make deliberate efforts to do so it will protect us from falling.
Not only that, but making room for God's love brings power to our faith walk -- Something that is desperately needed during an intense season of humanitarian work. You could say that's the season we're all in right now!
… And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ,and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Ephesians 3:16-19, NIV
SUMites, I'd be keen to hear more from you on how we can practice receiving His love. Feel free to share ideas in the comments, along with any other thoughts you might have.
SUMITE NATION: Church Without Walls, Worldwide Conference.
HEAR THE ROAR
April 5 & 6, 2019 Temecula, CA
Friday night, meet-and-greet at Lynn Donovan's home: 43952 Barletta Street, Temecula, CA 92592; 6pm
All day conference 9am - 4pm at Linfield Christian School 31950 Pauba Road., Temecula, CA 92592
Come hungry for powerful teaching. Testimony time. Prayer and a commissioning into our next move of God and into our victory in life.
Worship
Prayer
Teaching
Testimony
Sharing
Impartation
Encouragement
HOPE
In a few weeks a detailed itinerary of the event will be posted. Stay tuned!
Registration covers both days and includes lunch by Chick Fil A (Saturday). Bring a pillow for your chair, your Bible, your expectation for a GREAT MOVE OF GOD and your love. Also we will receive an offering. People from around the world have already purchased flights and made arrangements to attend. It will be worth every expense and effort to meet the SUMite family you have come to know and love, our "Church Without Walls."
Below are some travel sites to assist you in making arrangements. Also, join the Facebook travel group. Connect with others arriving at airports and make arrangements to carpool to Temecula. Remember this is Southern California. Traffic during rush hours is tremendous. Plan to arrive close to mid-morning or early afternoon. Normal travel time is about one hour from the San Diego or Ontario, CA airports. International travelers will arrive at LAX. Approximate drive time from LA is 2 1/2 hours. Plan to rent a car or limo and carpool together.
Uber and Lyft can be very affordable from San Diego or Ontario. Teri Fox did some checking and found Uber to be around $100 to $140 and can fit four people. Lyft is around $120 and can be booked ahead of time. Plan on four people.
The Temecula Air Shuttle quoted $219. Again plan to share the fare. Arrange carpooling in the travel group.
Hear The Roar - Summit Travel Group
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Travel collaboration for the SUMite, Hear The Roar, Summit April 5 & 6, 2019 in Temecula, California
Remember that Disneyland, Seaworld, Legoland, and Knotts and many other attractions are within an hour drive from Temecula.
I count it a privilege to see you face-to-face. I can't wait to worship with you and to pray with you. Let's look to Jesus and allow Him to fill us with His love and we will THRIVE as we live in faith and await the salvation of our loved ones!!!!!
Lynn Donovan
The leadership of SUM will arrive early to pray for you and for our event. Expect the Lord Jesus Christ to be among us. Expect His power, purpose and revelation to flow to us and through us.
This ROAR will be extraordinary!!!
REGISTER NOW. Click on the button below.
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If you think it impossible to attend, just watch this video. NOTHING is impossible with Jesus Christ!
Pray: Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. —Ephesians 3:20-21
Hallelujah and AMEN!! (AMEN, means – I BELIEVE!)
Friends, I LOVE this week. Every year it’s a highlight in the lives of so many in our community. I know every effort you made to fast and pray was smiled upon by our Father. Jesus was in the room with you and the angelic have been set in motion.
In the comments, give your praise to our Lord for all He has done and what you are believing, in faith, will happen.
Here is mine (Lynn Donovan)
My Father, you are good and kind. You always listen, comfort and stand behind me even when I pray outlandish and nearly impossible things. I love you with a breadth and depth I didn’t know I had. I pledge my loyalty, love and my entire being to You. I pray that I honor Your name in my life and that in some way, I have represented You well as your daughter.
Jesus, you are my best friend, my teacher, my advocate, protector and healer. I lack language to express the love and thankfulness that dwells deep within me. Please know that You are my everything. I am utterly nothing and lost without you and your daily, moment-by-moment, Presence in my life. I can’t wait to see what you teach me this year. Oh, please let it be so crazy big that my mind is blown every week. I love you. I adore you.
Holy Spirit, the power and trust you place upon me, shatters every part of my pride and self. Thank you for always standing with me in battle, in revelation and giving your heart and trust to me as I minister to others. I cling to you Holy Spirit with my entire being.
Father, Son and Holy Ghost, I’m undone to know you chose me. Be blessed through my life. In Jesus name. AMEN
YOUR TURN. Share your praise. Share what happened in your fast. Share the revelation. Share your heart. I adore you my SUMite family. And what is waiting for us in the near future is beyond your wildest imagination. I’ve caught a glimpse and it’s mind bending. Hugs, Lynn
If you didn’t quite make it, there is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus.
So, start again and finish strong. And for the many who have continued steadfast, press in because this is a breakthrough day for everyone!
Pray: I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18 may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. —Ephesians 3:16-19
Today is “revival day” and “divine reversal day.”
In the comments make your declaration over the areas in your life that need revival and reversal. Here are mine. (Lynn Donovan)
I declare in the Mighty Name of Jesus, my Savior and Advocate that I will advance the Kingdom of God. My husband will be saved, set free and proclaim Jesus is Lord. I declare my children and grandchildren will be sold out for Jesus and they will walk in His love and power. I declare that my writing will advance to greater levels of compassion, revelation and power, that lives are changed, and people come to know the healing and love of Jesus Christ. I declare a complete reversal of all assignments of the enemy, delays in my writing and teaching projects and decree all witchcraft and evil SHALL NOT STAND IN MY PRESENCE. I declare that I will love people with more empathy, guard my language to be salt and light and be intentional to sew goodness and reap goodness in my life and in the lives of those I interact online and in person.
I declare my Father is good. Every day, in every way. Jesus is my advocate, Rabbi, teacher, friend and healer. I stand in the power of the Holy Spirit to bring heaven to earth as proclaimed in the Lord’s prayer. In Jesus mighty and powerful name. AMEN
HALLELUJAH!
Okay, your turn. Make your declaration for all of heaven to see and the angelic to move upon. We are nearing the end of the fast but the beginning of NEWNESS in life!! Can I get an AMEN?
