AUTHOR: Tess Reeves. Have you ever been super excited to gift a bestie with a birthday surprise that you knew without a doubt would knock her off her feet? Did you have an image of what would her facial expression be when you handed it over? The joy on ...
‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ ‌ 

WHAT TO DO WITH A GIFT and more...

WHAT TO DO WITH A GIFT

AUTHOR: Tess Reeves.

Have you ever been super excited to gift a bestie with a birthday surprise that you knew without a doubt would knock her off her feet? Did you have an image of what would her facial expression be when you handed it over?

The joy on her face would be priceless. You literally could NOT wait to celebrate with her, because you’d hit the jackpot of all gifts! 

James 1:17 (NIV) “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”

Finally, the day arrived. I ordered her favorite cake from her favorite baker. She lived far, but the baker was willing to drive 45 minutes to deliver this much anticipated item. It was a homemade gluten free carrot cake. I mentally patted myself on the back as I remembered my bestie’s dietary restriction.

A group of us ladies started with dinner out and then games at a friend’s house. Then came the finale’ CAKE! I was beaming with pride. She was not. I had ordered the wrong type of cake. It was a spice and not carrot cake that she favored. I hung my head and sighed. There were mumbles and grumbles about the fruit and nuts in the cake, how heavy it was, and on and on. At the end of the evening, the obligatory “thanks for the cake” was offered. My heart sank along with my bank account. Ah well….I tried to shake it off and not make a show of disappointment and hurt. After all, I am a mature adult, right? 

I had forgotten about that incident until the Lord brought it up to me one morning in my quiet time. I had been mumbling and grumbling about my husband.  “If he would only be less selfish with his time and read his Bible, things would be better for us. Lord, change him.”

And then, my patient and loving Father whispered. Remember how your heart sank when your friend complained about the gift you thought would be perfect for her? Keith is not a cake, but he is a gift I gave to you.

Ouch!

It was the first time I had ever clearly viewed my husband as a gift from the Lord. As the giver of good gifts, I was surely breaking His heart in how I was receiving that gift.

It’s so easy to be thankful for all the things WE view as good gifts in OUR eyes. How much more are we graciously receiving literally everything the Lord gives to us in the way of health, nature, friendships, and yes, even our spouses. Jesus is our perfect gift. Through the guidance of my Him alone, I am learning that He really does give good gifts. This gift of an imperfect husband is teaching the imperfect me how to give and receive love exactly like God, my perfect Father. 

1 Timothy 4:4 ESV “For everything created by God is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving…”

AUTHOR: Tess Reeves. I’ve loved Our Creator for decades and never grow weary of hearing from Him. I was entrusted with Keith, my husband of 28 yrs. As if that wasn’t enough, he helped me to raise two magnificent daughters (Jessica, 25 and Jalyn, 22). I love our nondenominational church in Gainesville, VA and can be found regularly volunteering with our Outreach ministry. Nursing and Caregiving encourages my heart and keeps me connected with precious others.

The post WHAT TO DO WITH A GIFT appeared first on Spiritually Unequal Marriage.

Praying For Protection Seminar

At the start of every year, I offer training seminars to the financial donors that occurs on Giving Tuesday in December. If you missed your opportunity to support this ministry you can still give and register for this seminar. Link is at the bottom. The LIVE broadcast is Tuesday, January 28th at 11 am Pacific. There is a recorded link provided following. Hugs, Lynn

Seminar Two: Praying for Protection
The demonic assaults coming against true believers in the past two years has been at a level I’ve never seen before. Health, finances, divorces, children problems, legal problems, straight up real witchcraft and more. How do we truly put up barriers of protection around us, our homes, families, finances and more. How do we defeat the devil and then KEEP him away?

We will delve into erecting effective barriers in the spirit to surround our home. We will learn prayers to protect our children and discover how to protect our souls. This seminar is filled with practical tools that you can begin to use immediately. We will also cover how to stand firm when in the fires.

Donation Teaching Seminar with Lynn Donovan

Donation Teaching Seminar with Lynn Donovan

$25.00

Pay now

The post Praying For Protection Seminar appeared first on Spiritually Unequal Marriage.

What I Know For Sure

Hi, This is Barb Twigg with another What I Know For Sure

He wants MORE of you!

 

The post What I Know For Sure appeared first on Spiritually Unequal Marriage.

The Smallest Seeds

Joy Davies, New Jersey

Bio: I am a 46-year-old wife, mother, and writer raising a blended family with my husband of three years. Together, we parent my thirteen-year-old daughter and his three children, ages eleven, fourteen, and sixteen. I recently completed writing my first manuscript, a raw and reflective memoir that documents my journey through childhood trauma, addiction, abuse, and a painful custody battle, and how God met me in those storms with healing, surrender, and salvation through Christ. I enjoy cooking, reading, and volunteering, and I feel called to deepen my involvement in my church and to eventually create a safe, faith-based support group for women who have experienced trauma and abuse.

The Smallest Seeds

I met my husband during a season when I was not walking with the Lord. It wasn’t until I was deep in a custody battle—exhausted, broken, and falling apart on my kitchen floor one night that God met me there. In that moment, I surrendered my life to Him. Since then, everything has changed. My circumstances didn’t suddenly become easy, but He changed my heart.

I was led to an incredible church, surrounded by a loving church family. He placed friends in my life —women who mentor me, pray for me, and point me back to truth when I feel weary. Most importantly, God transformed me during seasons of uncertainty, grief, and relentless strife. Where fear once ruled, faith began to take root.

My husband does not walk with the Lord. He also struggles with alcoholism and carries deep, unresolved trauma from his previous marriage—wounds that often spill into ours. Our blended family is messy, and most days feel like a battle. But the peace the Lord gives me sustains me. It allows me to face each day knowing I am never alone. When I feel overwhelmed, I know I can run to Him, and He is always near.

For over a year, I prayed over my husband every night. He believed I had lost my mind—finding faith, going to church, and becoming someone he didn’t recognize. He often told me how much I had changed. He was right—I had. But standing firm in my faith came at a cost. At times, it felt like it created distance in our marriage. Still, I remained rooted, trusting God even when it hurt.

On Christmas Eve, when we didn’t have our children, I asked my husband if he would come to church with me so I wouldn’t have to go alone. To my complete surprise, he hesitantly agreed. He was simply appeasing me, but he was going—and I was grateful.

What he didn’t know was that many members of my church knew our story and had been faithfully praying for him. When we arrived, he was warmly welcomed by my friends and their husbands. One man, in particular, shared that he had been praying for him. My pastor came over, greeted him warmly, and placed a gentle hand on his head and back, expressing how happy he was that he was there.

At first, I thought, This is it. My introverted husband will never come back. But as he quietly sat through the service, I released those thoughts and surrendered the moment to God. Afterward, I asked him what he thought. To my amazement, he said he had never felt so welcomed and that he experienced a peace he couldn’t explain. He told me he finally understood why I go to church, why I have my faith—and even said he would consider coming again.

But God.

Never would I have expected that outcome. Yet God does what we believe is impossible. He is the God of the possible.

I know a seed was planted that night. Since then, there has still been significant struggle in our marriage—especially surrounding his drinking. I’ve feared the worst, tried to control outcomes, and even threatened to leave if he didn’t get help. But God has been teaching me something deeper.

Psalm 46:10 has long been my anchor verse: “Be still.” I’ve lived by those words for over a year, especially in my marriage. But only recently did the second half of the verse fully settle in my heart: “Know that I am God.”

To me, this means: Stop attempting to control every outcome. Stop letting fear and anxiety dictate your response. Allow God to be God.

Anxiety leads nowhere. The enemy uses fear, control, and doubt to seek and destroy. But God intends good for His children. Our husbands are His children too. Instead of seeing my marriage as a catastrophe, I was led to this: What if God placed me in my husband’s life to help lead him toward salvation?

God has a purposeful plan for each of us. In the midst of strife, our calling is to lean closer to Him and trust Him to do the work only He can do.

This is not an easy path. But I’ve witnessed small, undeniable seeds being planted. My husband agreed to attend couples therapy, and the therapist I found specializes in addiction. He has finally admitted he has a problem. These are seeds—and I choose to receive each one with deep gratitude to the Most High.

In John 13:7, Jesus says, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.” Let that truth resonate deeply. God has a plan for each of us, even when we cannot yet see it. Keep Him close. Trust Him to plant seeds. And believe that His work is unfolding—whether or not we recognize it yet.

The post The Smallest Seeds appeared first on Spiritually Unequal Marriage.

Balancing our Spouse and our Faith

Hello everyone

How are you all, I wonder? It has been a while! I hope the fast went well for you.

Well, today I’m actually a little raw. We have ‘raw’ days sometimes. This week my lovely hubby expressed that I’m charging off without him into stuff that I am interested in, leaving him alone. Much of this is my faith stuff.

He has gone to work now, leaving me alone at home, in turn; and I am left with the question: How do I balance my faith and remain true to myself, while equally staying within his world, and connecting with him?

This is the question we often wrestle with as SUMites, and this is why our website exists! We want to do it well, but we don’t always manage it. Quite honestly, I think I have not been getting the balance right lately.

One of the things I’ve been doing is overcommitting my time to things. For example, I have recently volunteered to play the piano at church. It means more time away from him. I build friendships from church, and that means I have friends he doesn’t know. How do I balance it all?

Well, here at SUM us writers just write what we’re living out… So, that is what I’m living out today.

“Are there any scriptures to help me with this?” I asked, this morning.

The only one that springs to mind is Proverbs 31, which talks about a very busy wife who does a lot of things!

One of the things she does is:

She does him good and not harm, all the days of her life (v 12), and

She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household (v.15), and

She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household are clothed in scarlet (v. 21)

(Proverbs 31, RSV)

I see those things — the food, the clothing — as symbolic of spiritual food, spiritual clothing, not literal food and clothing, although that too. In other words, she cares.

You know… When you have these hard conversations with your spouse, when they’re feeling alienated from you, and they don’t like what you’re doing, a first act is to try to make sure you reflect on your own part in it and try to redress the balance if things have gone a little awry; but then it’s also good to remember that you are actually caring for them deeply in spiritual terms, and what you are doing will still stand them in good stead.

Any thoughts? I look forward to seeing you in the comments.

Ann

The post Balancing our Spouse and our Faith appeared first on Spiritually Unequal Marriage.


Contact UsPast IssuesJoin This List