If you’re here because you couldn’t resist checking out the QR code on the back of our holiday card, may I just say… you might be a dork. But, then again, consider that I’m the one who put a QR code on the back of our holiday card. I can relate!

Saving this spot for an update on what’s been happening around the Caird Creek Wildlife Sanctuary over the past year or two, since for some reason (read: COVID) we haven’t been traveling to visit friends and family quite as much as we have in years past.

I’ll start with myself…

Pamela

The pandemic has seen me pick up all kinds of new hobbies, from painting to birdwatching to quilting to native plants. This last passion will stand the test of time, I’m sure, as I’ve always been fond of the “don’t need to water” aspect of landscaping with native plants. Since we’ve lived in Central Texas, I’ve also grown fond of the “attracts wildlife” aspect.

As part of all this, I joined the Native Plant Society of Texas and have been learning about landscaping with natives. I also created a video that I entered into their annual contest and — get this — I actually won. I made a site to go along with the video (as you do), so you can see it there. It’s been fun and I’ve learned a lot.

Michael

Michael has been crazy busy working at our family business, The Knitting Mill. This year brought an especially exciting development — the beginnings of our own factory. (We’ve been renting up until now.) Michael located a piece of land just over 3 acres in area and a stone’s throw from home, and we closed on it in September. Next step: building! We’re both really looking forward to moving everything into the new facility and getting to work.

Michael continues to play soccer with friends when he can make the time, and when he’s not recovering from injuries sustained in his last match.

Callum

Callum is a junior in high school this year. (Where has the time gone?) He’s now taller than both of his parents and wears a size 12 shoe. He’s been growing out his hair and trying new hairstyles this year, in addition to developing his own personal style with clothing and jewelry.

Rory

So far, Rory is only taller than one of us — me! I knew it was coming, but it somehow still took me by surprise. He is in 8th grade this year, preparing for next year in high school. Rory has been enjoying collecting Beyblades from Japan this year, which he uses to engage his father in Beyblade battles.

The rest of the sanctuary dwellers

Right now, our pets include:

• Shorty: geriatric Chihuahua with one eye and fading hearing. His sense of smell whenever food is nearby is undiminished, however, and he runs and hops like a puppy when anticipating getting a treat.
• Honey: our majestic Great Pyrenees is enjoying her role as Alpha, demanding pets and fearlessly guarding the Clan with her ferocious barks.
• Crusoe: our youngster Schnauzer mix just tries to get along with his elders. He coaxes Honey into a play fight now and then, and gives Shorty the respect he deserves.
• Dulcie and Oreo: the dynamic goat duo are doing just fine. They’ve grown lots of furry protection for the cold winter months. We are thinking about throwing a wrench in the works by letting Dulcie become a mother. If that works out as we would like, we will come out with another kid or two, as well as some milk and goat cheese.

   

We’ve got a new puppy — I keep meaning to write a tribute to our very special stray, Cinnamon, who we lost last year, but I’ll save that for another time. This one is about Crusoe and his playmate, Cocoa.

Really, I hadn’t intended to write anything, just to let this video speak for itself:

 

   

Well, I’ve just sent Michael off with the Christmas cards, after a marathon session of sticking, stuffing and licking. And yet, I’d like to catch up with friends and family in a much more in-depth way (I miss you!!!), so I thought I’d do the equivalent of an “annual newsletter” right here on these virtual pages. (Please send along your own updates in email or in the comments!)

While it’s difficult to encapsulate a year in a few words, I’ll begin with the important stuff: we’re all healthy, safe and fully employed, both at work and school. We’re still in Liberty Hill, Texas, an area Northwest of Austin that’s undergone dramatic growth since we moved here in 2010.

Measures of growth: the second Domino’s Pizza just opened and a Dairy Queen is on its way. More interestingly, an Austin Community College campus is being built somewhat nearby, putting continuing education within comfortable reach. Meanwhile, the local school district has grown to include three different elementary schools.

Pamela

For me, it’s been an exciting year. I got a new supervisor at work who is both inspiring and driving me to make my team’s work better than ever. Meanwhile, on the personal side, I’ve begun working with a stellar personal trainer who spurs me to the gym at 5 a.m. every Friday morning. My fitness progress has been up and down, but the general trend is up and to the right — it’s definitely something I’ll be continuing in the coming year.

Meanwhile, I’ve started collaborating with the local newspaper to create a business directory and local resource website to help bring together this fast-growing community and to support locally-owned businesses. It’s just a side gig, but it’s a great way to get and remain plugged into what’s happening around us, which is always interesting if not always positive.

You’d get some insight into my hobbies if you watched the flow of mail into the household. There’s always another envelope from China containing some tiny electronic part or another. That’s because I’ve combined my interest in home automation with my tendency to be a bargain hunter — you can build your own smart home devices pretty cheaply, it turns out. That’s also fed my do-it-yourself inclinations, and I am now the proud owner of a jigsaw, an oscillating tool, a drill and a rotary tool.

Michael

Michael celebrated a big milestone — the big five-oh, they call it — this year, and his big birthday present will help him relive his youth as a British Mod.

Oh, yes, that’s a Vespa, which is definitely a scooter and not a moped, according to the Texas Department of Public Safety, despite what his children will tell you.

Meanwhile, The Knitting Mill is going strong and keeping him busy, but he manages to squeeze in football/soccer games with the boys now and then. He’s also a fierce competitor in fantasy leagues both in American football and the British version.

Callum

It’s hard to believe, but Callum entered JUNIOR HIGH this school year. This means he’s now got a locker at school and 8 different teachers (one for each class), but, most importantly, it means he’s now playing football (the American kind) on the official school team.

His daily football practice during the season also introduced him to his new favorite sport — powerlifting. He’s a strong lad, and he’ll only be getting stronger if the trend continues! (There’s no official powerlifting team until High School, which he’ll enter in a couple of years.)

He’s doing well on the academic side, as well, and has been placed in both Advanced Math and Advanced Language Arts (English, reading and writing). Advanced Math hasn’t been his favorite subject, but he’s starting to get a lot more comfortable with it. And he’s always enjoyed Language Arts, just like his mother.

In his copious spare time, he’s struck up a fast and firm friendship with his cousin, Lance, with whom he plays online computer games at every opportunity.

Rory

Rory is also in the middle of an important school year, as 4th grade is his last in Elementary School (he goes to Intermediate next) and it marks the first time he’s had specialized teachers in Language Arts and Science/Math.

That stupendous school-district growth I mentioned resulted in the school having to hire new teachers after the academic year started, and Rory was among those chosen to move over to the newly-formed classes. He hasn’t missed a beat, showing that the school’s faith in his resilience and adaptability were well placed.

His spare time is typically spent building imaginative things, either in the virtual world (Minecraft) or in the real one (train layouts and Scalextric race courses). He also loves riding his bicycle and especially the hoverboard he got for his birthday this year.

 

Late breaking update (this video was made as I was writing the rest of this post):

 

The Family

Our big vacation this year was spent on an RV road trip with two other local families, which involved a drive to our closest National Park, Big Bend. It’s a part of the world that none of us had visited before, and we thoroughly enjoyed canoeing and hiking in the wide open spaces near the Texas/Mexico border.

Probably the highlight of the trip was our last night in the RV park, when, just as we were busy preparing a dinner of hamburgers and hot dogs, a dramatic desert thunderstorm suddenly came upon us. All of the members of all three families quickly abandoned our picnic tables and madly rushed to haul all of the gear and the food/drinks to the RV park’s common building amid the downpour.

We were surprised to find that we had the place all to ourselves, so, naturally, a party atmosphere set in. There’s nothing like the cozy feeling of being inside, safe and warm, while a thunderstorm rages outside. Being amongst friends — and so many of them — just made it all the more special.

   

We’re lucky to be able to get away for the Thanksgiving holiday, retreating to my late father’s house in East Texas. It’s right on the edge of the Davy Crockett National Forest, and, surrounded by tall pines, it feels like we’re in the middle of nowhere. (We typically only see these giant trees when around here, so Rory calls them “family trees,” as he knows their presence means we are close to our home away from home, Grandpa’s house.)

In recent years, we’ve come here for Thanksgiving and often around Christmas, too, when the boys love to see their cousins. I used to hate cooking here, but, over time, we’ve been able to put together enough equipment, and perhaps I’ve become more accustomed to it. (A meat thermometer would be nice, though, I must say.) It helps that I’m only cooking for our own little family, even if the number of dishes and quantity of food is much more than would feed us — at least for a single meal.

That puts this whole endeavor more in the category of recreational cooking, and I don’t feel the pressure to make everything perfectly presented, nor do I bother with making it all come out at the same time. It’s actually quite relaxing, especially when I’ve got the music playing and the doors wide open (it’s not all that cold here). When we checked the forecast before leaving, Alexa told us we were in for steady rain for the entire visit, but so far it’s been sunny and nice.

I do miss my family and good friends on days like this. I’ve got a lot of memories of holidays in this house with my Dad and family members that are no longer with us — notably, my cousin Philip and his wife, Doris. And, of course, I think of my Mom and all the cooking I did with her for family get-togethers over the years. (This year, I’ve made her Pumpkin Cheesecake.)

I also hosted two campouts for the Hash House Harriers here — the Space City and the OTR Texas Interhash — before the house was built. So, often when I’m up here, I think about scouting trail (and getting lost scouting trail), as well as about running in the woods and having lots of fun.

But this Thanksgiving, someday, will be a memory, as well, of a time when my boys were 7 and 10 and fought constantly. Yet, when they managed to play together, it was beautiful and delightful.

On the way here, the boys dozed now and then, but, between naps, we listened to an audiobook in the truck — the first book from the The 39 Clues series. It’s the most effective way we’ve found to keep the road-trip chaos to a minimum. Shorty sat on my lap nearly the whole ride, and Michael did the driving via a completely novel route recommended by Google Maps as a way to avoid holiday traffic and accidents.

Well, better get back to cooking and relaxing. Here’s how things were looking a few minutes ago:

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours, wherever you may be!

   

I remember her crossing the finish line at the New York Triathlon in Harriman State Park in 2001, struggling and smiling — she’d made it!

We’d spent countless hours training together for the race, bonding over our less-than-athletic physiques and our determination. But we both crossed the finish line triumphantly.

I remember us going dress shopping before Y2K, then dancing and celebrating in a private venue off of Times Square as the turn of the century approached — we were so lucky! We slipped out at nearly-midnight to watch the ball drop — then cheer and hug —  in the frigid outdoor temperatures, still wearing our fancy gowns.

She introduced me to so many wonderful people, even the realtor who helped us find our house here in Texas. And, somehow, it wasn’t a surprise that she knew a real estate agent in Texas, because Jodie “Tigger” Kahn knew everybody.

We had a lot in common, so, when I returned the favor by introducing her to some of my favorite groups — the Hash House Harriers and the Riverdogs  — she understood the appeal immediately and made fast friends.

We worked in the same industry and, early in our friendship, she gave me anonymous tips that led to breaking news stories. I can still hear her giggling as she shared something that she was particularly pleased about — she had such an appetite for and appreciation of life.

This week, my friend Jodie, known to so many as Tigger, passed away after fighting breast cancer for a little over two years. With her typical foresight, she set up a Facebook group for her “chosen family,” where we could keep up to date and send love and support.

Jodie was an organizer, a connector and a do-er. With some folks who pass at her youthful age (43), you might lament that she’d lived so little of her expected life. But Jodie, she truly lived every moment with gusto — there was nothing to regret.

There are so many things to admire about her, but I especially admire the way she handled her illness. There’s the stereotypical image of the brave cancer fighter, and I don’t want to tread any of those well-worn paths with this narrative. Jodie was just Jodie — brave and fearless in her entire life, not just in her cancer-fighting one.

I last saw her in 2013. She reached out to me via Facebook after seeing from my updates that I was in town — in NYC. I tend not to do much other than work when I’m in town for a conference — the events themselves can be so draining. So, it took a few exchanges of Facebook messages, but she finally told me that she’d been diagnosed with breast cancer. Shocked by the news, up I went to the Upper West Side to her apartment, where we spent a few hours catching up.

Looking back, though I’m sure she wanted to see me, I feel like her real purpose was to allow me to see her — in case it was the last time, which did turn out to be the case. It was then, after I asked, that she added me to her “secret” Facebook support group, which she was reluctant to ask people whether they’d like to join — she worried they’d feel pressured if she was the one to ask. In these gestures she showed the depth of her thoughtfulness.

She certainly didn’t need to add anyone to the group against their wishes. Looking at the group now, I see it has 395 members! She made so many friends at events like Burning Man, Flipside and Figment — places where she could be herself entirely and express her creative exuberance.

While Jodie never talked about dying, it was obvious (to me, at least) that she was resolved to live every moment to the fullest with the best quality of life possible. She wrote about her decision to end treatment and receive hospice care at the beginning of July:

While this may sound “bad” and “scary”, it is actually the right decision. By ending treatment, it allows me access to a lot of resources I don’t have while in treatment.

Hospice provides many services but most importantly it gives me a team of people focused on my quality of life. My team includes a pain management team to minimize the pain, a nurse who comes weekly to check on me, get my any prescriptions or supplies, a social worker, counselor, and even a home health aide to help around the house.

By deciding to officially end treatment, I now have a professional team to help me get through each day and help me to manage pain so it is tolerable.

Pragmatically, and without self-pity (though I wouldn’t fault her if she felt that and anger and more!), she comforts her friends and assures them she’s confident in her “right decision” to make the best of each and every day remaining to her.

I’m unbelievably sad that bouncy Tigger is no longer with us, but I know she did it her way and is a model for the rest of us as we face the inevitable. And let’s not wait until we’re diagnosed with cancer or some other unspeakable disease before we follow her lead. I’ll leave you with a public service message from the Tigger herself: