“You can’t tell a creative person what to do.” < That’s the first thing Kaizen-Muse Creativity Coaching students learn in the KMCC training.
When it comes to nurturing creativity, even well-intentioned, seemingly perfect advice can backfire. The moment you tell a creative person what to do, you risk stripping away the fun and sense of autonomy they derive from steering the creative process themselves. There may be initial compliance, but then resistance, resentment, and swear words are eminent. I know this from experience
When I started writing my Nine Modern Day Muses book, I was procrastinating, resistant, and overwhelmed. I decided to enlist a life coach.
She told me what to do to get the book written according to her own ideas. The suggestions weren’t suited for me, they just overwhelmed me even more. Nothing sounded fun. I needed help with getting beyond resistance, not how to write a book - that would come with my natural instincts.
I tried to comply to her to-do list, but I had this subterranean urge to say, “ F^#! this” so I did. I don’t want to be told what to do. I want questions. Questions open me up to explore possibilities from my own resources, experiences, and connections to an inner creative landscape which is wacky not conventional. I needed someone familiar with the sensitivities of the creative person.
One of the attractions of being a creator, whether it’s writing a book or painting a weird thing with three hearts is acting on some curious and irresistible impulse delivered from the depths of our mysterious selves, and then playing with it inside the unique laboratory of who we are until it validates our brilliance, or at the very least, gives us a joyride. It’s not always easy to answer a creative call but worth moving beyond the complexities, inner demons, and endless distractions to be true to ourselves.
When its flowing, creativity gives us a sense of control in a world where we often feel helpless, it is driven by the fiery passion of being in charge of our own adventure.
Feedback, suggestions, and constructive criticism from others is helpful and smart to elicit; they give perspectives we don’t always see ourselves When someone offers kindling, I check in with my intuition, then make a choice. I’m still in control; that is what’s different from being told what to do… the respect that comes withobvious choice.
Instead of an edict, there is a “what if ..” question. What if I made this process fun? What if I let the Muses tell me about themselves? What I you focused on what I love about writing? What if I called a muse, Bea Silly. We do better asking ourselves these questions because oppressively telling ourselves what to do, also results in resistance.
I finally wrote The Nine Modern Day Muses and a Bodyguard by finding a fun structure and tapping into my love of writing, but I wasn’t confident it would sell to a publisher. I met with a book coach who told me the name was impractical and elusive, I should call it Ten Creativity Principles or something dry like that, so people knew what it was about. She also said a publisher wouldn’t look at it with the way I used the whimsical fonts and format. Poo!
I stomped home and had some rocky road ice cream. My first thought was she must be right, she has published books out there. My childlike self was cranky, pouting, and crashing from the ice cream until an intuitively defiant, creative wonder woman aha moment kicked in and I realized I didn’t have to follow this person’s advice. It was a clear feeling that it wasn’t right for my work.
Creativity is an act of rebellion and a world we do best to pioneer ourselves.
“So what, I’ll do it anyway, I’d rather publish it myself than make those changes,” were the words that floated above my curly hair in a cartoon thought bubble.
I sent it out into the universe as is. Two weeks later an agent grabbed it sold it to Penguin Putnam who published it … with the same title, the fonts, format, and silliness. Poignant lesson.
Intuition and defiance can be a dynamic duo when figuring out our own path in a world of people trying to tell us what to do and with so much out there to compare ourselves.
The response, “So What, I’ll do it anyway,” works in myriad ways.
Voice The Rebellion
I’m too old… So what do it anyway.
I am not confident So what do it anyway.
I am resistant… So what… do it anyway.
People won’t get it: So what..
I’ll be exposed… So what..
I don’t know where to begin Start anywhere for 30 seconds.
What else stops you? Say, so what and do it anyway.
This response to voices that can derail creativity is the gift of the Modern Day Muse, Bea Silly, the Muse of Childlike Play and it’s one of the tools that has freed people’s creativity for twenty years in Kaizen-Muse Creativity Coaching. It neutralizes or supersedes voices that are often operating in irrational or exaggerated fear. It frees us with defiance, rebelliousness, and satisfaction.
There are many life coaches who are exceptions to the one mentioned in this story, they ask questions and respectfully guide the client’s own course of action. But I’m grateful for the dubious experience I had because it was responsible for the genesis of the Kaizen-Muse Creativity Coaching. I wondered how many people were being blocked by people who don’t understand the creative process.
The Modern Day Muse, Bea Silly will be back this week for a few short and sweet ways she can help unleash your creativity and creative living.
Come play in a Wild Abandon Zoom Workshop this coming Wednesday, July 10 at 4pm pacific/ 7pm eastern. $25 Hour and a half.
Dispatching Muses,
Jill
Find more Jill stuff here.
Taking applications for the August Kaizen-Muse Creativity Coaching Training
