What's New in Employment Law?

We’ve all heard it. A manager asks an employee how things are going, and the response is a quick, “Fine.” HR checks in after a difficult conversation, and the employee insists everything is okay. A supervisor notices that a previously engaged employee has become unusually quiet and asks whether something is wrong. “Nope. I’m fine.” Everyone moves on, relieved that there doesn’t appear to be a problem.

But here’s something I’ve learned after years of helping employers navigate difficult workplace situations: Sometimes the employees we should be most concerned about are the ones who have stopped telling us what’s wrong.

Think about it. The employee who complains about a difficult supervisor is giving the organization an opportunity to address the problem. The employee who raises concerns about unfair treatment is providing information management might not otherwise have. Even the employee who seems to complain about everything is, at least, still communicating. Those conversations aren’t always comfortable, but they give employers an opportunity to listen and respond.

What about the employee who used to speak up and suddenly doesn’t? The one who stops offering ideas in meetings, no longer volunteers for projects, and responds to every question with a polite but unenthusiastic, “Whatever you think is best.” Maybe that employee is having a bad week. Or maybe they’ve decided that speaking up isn’t worth the trouble.

Silence Isn’t Always a Good Sign

I regularly talk with employers who are genuinely surprised when an employee resigns, files a complaint, or raises concerns about something that’s apparently been happening for months. Their reaction is often the same: “We had no idea!” Sometimes that’s absolutely true. But sometimes, when we look more closely, the signs were there.

Perhaps the employee tried to raise concerns with a supervisor who dismissed them. Someone promised to follow up but never did. Or the employee watched what happened to a coworker who complained and decided that staying quiet was the safer choice.

Eventually, the employee stopped trying. From management’s perspective, things may even have appeared to improve. The complaints stopped. The difficult conversations disappeared. Unfortunately, what looked like improvement may actually have been disengagement, frustration, or a loss of trust.

Not every unhappy employee has a legal claim, and employers aren’t responsible for making everyone happy. But when employees stop communicating, organizations lose valuable information about what’s happening in their workplaces. And unresolved concerns sometimes become much bigger problems.

The Little Things Aren’t Always Little

When we talk about respectful workplaces, we tend to focus on harassment, discrimination, retaliation, and other serious misconduct. Of course, those issues matter enormously. But workplace culture is also shaped by smaller, everyday interactions.

Does a supervisor roll their eyes when someone asks a question? Does an employee get labeled “difficult” for disagreeing? Do managers actually listen when someone raises a concern, or are they already preparing their defense? When employees make mistakes, are they given constructive feedback or embarrassed in front of their coworkers?

Over time, these interactions send powerful messages about what an organization values. Employees notice which managers welcome questions, which ones become defensive, and whether concerns actually receive attention.

None of this means employees should be shielded from criticism. Managers need to establish expectations, address performance problems, and make decisions that won’t please everyone. The goal isn’t to eliminate uncomfortable conversations. It’s to create a workplace where people can have them respectfully and honestly.

Five Things Employers Can Do Right Now

Building a workplace where employees feel comfortable speaking up doesn’t require an expensive initiative or a 40-page policy. But it does require attention and follow-through.

1. Notice changes in behavior. When an engaged employee suddenly becomes withdrawn or stops participating, pay attention. Don’t jump to conclusions or assume there’s a workplace problem. But a thoughtful check-in may open the door to an important conversation.
2. Teach leaders to listen. Too often, supervisors respond to concerns by explaining, defending, or trying to fix everything immediately. Train them to ask questions, listen without becoming defensive, and recognize when HR needs to become involved.
3. Make speaking up easy. Employees should know where to raise concerns and have more than one reporting option, particularly when the issue involves their supervisor. They also need confidence that concerns will be taken seriously and retaliation won’t be tolerated.
4. Close the loop. Asking for feedback and then disappearing is a terrific way to lose trust. Employers can’t always provide the outcome employees want, but appropriate follow-up shows that their concerns weren’t ignored. Serious allegations also require prompt evaluation and appropriate action.
5. Hold managers accountable. Results matter, but so does how supervisors achieve them. A manager who dismisses concerns, embarrasses employees, or discourages questions can undermine an otherwise healthy workplace. Being a high performer shouldn’t give anyone a free pass to treat people poorly.

A Little Humanity Goes a Long Way

Most managers and HR professionals I work with genuinely want to do the right thing. They care about their employees and work hard to create positive workplaces. But they’re also busy, frequently overwhelmed, and pulled in a dozen directions. It’s easy to become so focused on deadlines and operational demands that we overlook the quieter signs that someone may be struggling.

And employees are human, too. Sometimes they need clearer expectations or difficult feedback. Sometimes they need additional support. And sometimes they simply need to know that someone has noticed they’re having a hard time.

Being compassionate doesn’t mean abandoning accountability or solving everyone’s personal problems. It means recognizing that how we treat people matters. A manager who can deliver tough feedback with dignity, acknowledge a mistake, or listen without becoming defensive is helping build the trust that makes a workplace function.

One Last Thought

A healthy workplace isn’t one where nobody complains. It’s one where employees believe they can raise concerns, managers are willing to listen, and problems are addressed before silence becomes the easier choice.

So the next time an employee tells you, “I’m fine,” don’t automatically assume there’s nothing more to the story. There may not be. But taking a moment to show genuine interest could open the door to an important conversation.

Sometimes, that’s where the best employee relations work begins.

The post The Most Dangerous Words at Work? “I’m Fine.” first appeared on Shaw Law Group.

      

I spent part of last week in San Antonio, catching up with old friends, making a few new ones, sharing some laughs, and talking about one of my favorite subjects: employment law. I know that might not sound like everyone’s idea of a great time, but for me, it really was! There’s something wonderful about sitting around a table with people you’ve known and respected for years, swapping stories about the crazy situations we encounter in our practices, debating how we’d handle a particularly difficult issue, and realizing that even after all these years, there’s still so much to learn. I came home energized, full of new ideas, and reminded of just how lucky I am to do what I do.

I was there for a meeting of the Management Labor and Employment Roundtable (MLER), a group of management-side labor and employment attorneys from across the country. These are lawyers who have been doing this work for decades, know their stuff cold, and aren’t afraid to share their experiences, opinions, and occasionally some pretty entertaining stories about the challenges of practicing employment law. One of the things I love most about these gatherings is how much I learn. And after more than 30 years of practicing employment law, that’s saying something!

We spent time talking about the issues we’re seeing in our practices, the challenges our clients are facing, and how we’re adapting to a profession that seems to change almost daily. Of course, artificial intelligence was a big part of the conversation, including how we’re using it in our own practices and what it means for the employers we advise. We also talked about the practical challenges of advising employers, managing client expectations, and finding better ways to deliver excellent legal services.

What I find particularly interesting is how differently attorneys can approach the same issue. I’ll describe a situation I’ve encountered, and someone from another state will offer a perspective I hadn’t considered. Or another lawyer will share something that worked particularly well for a client, and I’ll immediately think about how we might use that approach at Shaw Law Group or EmployersLawyer. Sometimes we agree, sometimes we don’t, but I always come away with something valuable.

And isn’t that how it should be?

I think it’s easy, particularly when you’ve been doing something for a long time, to get comfortable with your own way of thinking. We have our routines, approaches, and opinions about what works. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t a better way to do something, or that someone else hasn’t figured out something we haven’t.

That’s one of the reasons it’s so important to spend time with other professionals who do what you do. Not just at conferences where you sit in a room and listen to presentations, but in settings where you can really talk, exchange ideas, ask questions, and learn from one another. I don’t care how experienced you are. There is always someone who knows something you don’t!

And that’s exactly the kind of learning environment Joe Beachboard and I wanted to create when we launched EmployersLawyer. Between the two of us, we have more than 60 years of experience advising employers, but we also know that nobody has all the answers, particularly in an area of law that changes as quickly as ours. We wanted to create a place where employers and HR professionals could benefit from our experience, ask questions, exchange ideas, and learn from one another instead of having to figure everything out on their own.

Through our twice-weekly Office Hours, we discuss new legal developments, tackle difficult workplace situations, and answer questions from the people who are actually dealing with these issues every day. Our weekly Week@Work updates help employers keep up with important developments, and our California Compliance Monthly programs give us an opportunity to dig deeper into the issues that deserve more attention. But what I particularly love is the exchange of ideas. Someone asks a question that makes us look at a familiar issue differently. A workplace scenario leads to a discussion about what might happen if the facts were just a little different. And sometimes, those discussions teach Joe and me something, too!

In many ways, it’s the same thing I experienced in San Antonio. The difference is that we’re bringing those conversations directly to the people responsible for making workplace decisions. HR professionals and business leaders shouldn’t have to wait until something goes wrong to get practical guidance, and they certainly shouldn’t have to navigate every difficult situation alone.

It’s also why I believe so strongly in the work we do at Shaw Law Group. Our clients aren’t simply looking for someone to recite a statute or summarize a court decision. They want thoughtful, practical advice from people who understand their workplaces and can help them make good decisions. The more we learn, the more perspectives we consider, and the more willing we are to challenge our own assumptions, the better we can serve them.

My time in San Antonio was a wonderful reminder that professional development doesn’t always mean taking another class or reading another article. Sometimes it means sitting around a table with smart people, asking good questions, and being willing to listen. I left with some terrific ideas, a few things I want to try, and an even greater appreciation for the colleagues I’ve gotten to know over the years.

So, here’s my suggestion for the week: Find opportunities to spend time with people who do what you do, particularly people who might see things a little differently. Share your experiences, ask for their opinions, and be open to learning something new. Whether you’re an attorney, an HR professional, a manager, or a business owner, I can’t think of a much better investment in your professional growth.

And if you happen to have a little fun along the way, even better.

The post The Best Lawyers Know They Don’t Know Everything first appeared on Shaw Law Group.

      

It’s the kind of story you’d expect from a spy thriller. Except it allegedly happened in a conference room at OpenAI, the company behind ChatGPT.

Earlier this month, federal authorities arrested an OpenAI engineer accused of secretly installing an audio recording device in an executive conference room at the company’s San Francisco headquarters. According to prosecutors, the device was hidden behind a television, plugged into a USB port, and concealed in toilet paper. Investigators allege the employee intended to capture confidential conversations involving company executives and sensitive technology. The employee faces a federal criminal charge, but is presumed innocent unless proven guilty.

Although the allegations certainly are unusual, they raise an increasingly common workplace issue: unauthorized recordings. And with artificial intelligence (AI) making it easier than ever to capture, transcribe, and summarize conversations, California employers have good reason to pay attention. After all, unauthorized workplace recordings don’t always involve hidden electronic devices. Sometimes, they involve an AI assistant that nobody realized was listening.

Meet Your Newest Attendee: AI

Imagine conducting a performance review when you notice an unfamiliar participant in your virtual meeting. It’s an AI notetaker. Perhaps the employee activated it to capture the discussion, or maybe it automatically joined through someone’s calendar. Either way, the platform is capturing the conversation, generating a transcript, and preparing a summary.

AI meeting assistants have become increasingly popular because they can document discussions, identify action items, and produce detailed notes in seconds. For busy employees and leaders, these tools offer obvious benefits. Unfortunately, their convenience can overshadow significant legal concerns, particularly when employees use them without understanding the rules governing confidential workplace conversations.

California employers should be especially careful because the state’s recording laws can apply regardless of whether someone uses a traditional recording device or newer technology.

California’s All-Party Consent Rule

California is commonly described as a two-party consent state, but it’s more accurately an all-party consent state. Under Penal Code section 632, intentionally recording or electronically eavesdropping on a confidential communication generally requires the consent of everyone participating in the conversation. Whether a communication is confidential depends on whether at least one participant has an objectively reasonable expectation that the discussion isn’t being overheard or recorded.

Consider how many workplace conversations could fall into that category. Performance evaluations, disciplinary meetings, workplace investigations, reasonable accommodation discussions, and conversations involving medical information often include sensitive matters that participants reasonably expect to remain private. Executive meetings addressing confidential business decisions can raise similar concerns.

An AI tool that captures audio to produce a transcript may trigger these requirements just as an ordinary recording device would. Depending on the circumstances, unlawful recording can result in criminal penalties and civil liability. Under Penal Code section 637.2, an injured person may seek statutory damages of $5,000 per violation or three times actual damages, whichever is greater, without having to establish actual financial harm.

Of course, not every workplace conversation qualifies as confidential, and the circumstances matter. But employers shouldn’t assume a recording is permissible simply because everyone involved works for the same organization or the technology makes recording easy.

But Everyone Saw the Notetaker!

Suppose an AI assistant appears in a virtual meeting with a name like “Meeting Notes AI.” Everyone can see it, and nobody objects. Does that mean everyone has consented to being recorded?

Not necessarily. Consent may be express or implied under the circumstances, but merely seeing an unfamiliar participant or recording tool doesn’t automatically establish legally sufficient consent. And employers shouldn’t assume that a general technology policy authorizes every recording of a confidential conversation.

The better approach is to clearly disclose when a conversation will be recorded, explain how the technology will be used, and obtain appropriate consent before recording begins. If someone objects, the employer should address the concern before proceeding.

Employers also need to understand how their meeting platforms operate. Some applications automatically activate recording or transcription features, while others allow individual participants to introduce third-party AI assistants without the meeting organizer’s approval. As a result, a leader conducting a sensitive conversation may not even realize that the discussion is being captured.

What Happens to the Recording?

Obtaining consent is only part of the problem. Once an AI tool records a conversation, employers need to understand what happens to the information afterward. Where is the recording stored? Who can access the transcript? How long is the information retained? Does the vendor use customer data to improve or train its AI systems?

These questions become particularly important when the conversation involves sensitive employee information. Imagine an AI assistant recording an employee’s medical disclosures during an accommodation meeting or capturing confidential witness statements during a workplace investigation. Information intended for a limited audience could end up stored with a third-party technology provider or shared more broadly than anyone anticipated.

Employers also should consider whether recording certain conversations could compromise attorney-client privilege, expose proprietary business information, or create additional records subject to discovery in litigation. A transcript that seems helpful today could become a significant liability tomorrow.

And there’s another concern: AI-generated summaries aren’t necessarily accurate. These tools can misunderstand statements, attribute comments to the wrong person, or produce summaries that don’t accurately reflect what occurred. An employer that relies on an inaccurate AI summary to support a disciplinary or termination decision could create problems that extend well beyond recording consent.

Can Employers Ban Workplace Recordings?

Generally, California employers can establish reasonable policies governing workplace recordings, including restrictions designed to protect confidential information and employee privacy. However, broad prohibitions should be reviewed carefully because employees may have legally protected rights to document certain workplace activities.

For example, the National Labor Relations Act protects certain concerted activities relating to employees’ terms and conditions of employment. Other laws protect employees who report suspected unlawful conduct or engage in protected whistleblowing activities. Although these protections don’t automatically authorize recordings that violate California law, overly broad workplace policies can create separate legal concerns.

Employers therefore should avoid assuming that a blanket prohibition on every recording, under every circumstance, is necessarily the best solution. Instead, policies should explain when recording is permitted, when advance authorization and consent are required, and how the organization will protect confidential information without interfering with employees’ legal rights.

What Should Employers Do?

The first step is understanding what technology employees are already using. Employers should determine whether their video conferencing platforms automatically activate recording or transcription features and whether employees are introducing third-party AI assistants into workplace meetings. Waiting until a confidential conversation has already been recorded is hardly an effective compliance strategy.

Next, employers should establish clear procedures for obtaining consent and restricting recordings during particularly sensitive discussions, including investigations, disciplinary meetings, and accommodation conversations. They also should evaluate vendor privacy practices, including data storage, access, retention, and potential use of recordings to train AI systems.

Finally, leaders need training. They should understand that an AI-generated transcript isn’t necessarily reliable, that sensitive information should not be uploaded into unapproved systems, and that employees may not appreciate the legal distinction between taking their own notes and electronically recording everyone else’s conversation.

A clear, practical policy can help employers take advantage of useful technology without unnecessarily exposing confidential information or creating new legal problems.

The Bottom Line

The allegations involving OpenAI represent an extreme example of the risks associated with unauthorized workplace recording. Importantly, that criminal case concerns an allegedly concealed physical recording device, not ChatGPT’s meeting-recording technology. Nevertheless, the larger lesson applies to California employers of every size.

Technology has made it remarkably easy to record conversations, but it hasn’t eliminated the legal obligations associated with employee privacy, confidentiality, and consent. Whether an employee uses a sophisticated device hidden behind a television or an AI assistant quietly joining a virtual meeting, employers need to understand who’s listening, what’s being recorded, and where that information is going.

Before your next sensitive workplace meeting, it’s worth asking a simple question: Who’s recording this conversation, and did everyone agree?

The post Who’s Recording This Meeting? first appeared on Shaw Law Group.

      

Who counts as “family”? It’s a question California employers likely will hear more often, particularly when employees request time off to care for someone who isn’t a spouse, parent, child, or other traditionally recognized relative.

Consider an employee who asks for several weeks off to care for a seriously ill longtime friend. The two aren’t related, have never lived together, and have no legal relationship. But they’ve supported each other through life’s challenges for decades and consider themselves family. Does the employee qualify for protected leave? Can the employee receive Paid Family Leave benefits? The answers may surprise some employers. And a new California law will make understanding the distinction even more important.

Senate Bill 590, signed in 2025, expands California’s Paid Family Leave program to include employees who take time off to care for a seriously ill “designated person.” The law takes effect July 1, 2028. That’s still some time away, but the underlying concept is already part of California employment law. Employers who haven’t adjusted their leave practices may already be getting it wrong.

Wait, Isn’t This Already the Law?

Sort of. And that’s where things get interesting.

Since January 1, 2023, the California Family Rights Act (CFRA) has allowed eligible employees to take job-protected leave to care for a designated person with a serious health condition. A “designated person” includes someone related to the employee by blood or whose relationship with the employee is the equivalent of a family relationship. That definition goes well beyond traditional family relationships. It potentially encompasses a close friend, longtime companion, or another individual who plays a family-like role in the employee’s life.

Employers covered by CFRA generally must provide up to 12 weeks of protected leave to eligible employees for qualifying reasons. They may limit an employee to one designated person per 12-month period. But there’s a catch.

Until SB 590 becomes operative, an employee taking CFRA leave to care for a designated person who isn’t otherwise a qualifying family member may not be eligible for California Paid Family Leave benefits. In other words, the employee may be entitled to time away from work but not the wage-replacement benefits that would help make taking that time financially possible. SB 590 addresses that disconnect.

What Changes in 2028?

Beginning on July 1, 2028, California’s Paid Family Leave program will expand to cover eligible employees who need time away from work to care for a seriously ill “designated person.” Currently, Paid Family Leave provides eligible workers with up to eight weeks of partial wage replacement within a 12-month period for qualifying reasons. Depending on their earnings and applicable benefit limits, employees generally receive approximately 70 to 90 percent of their wages.

SB 590 does not increase the duration of Paid Family Leave benefits. Instead, it expands who an employee can care for while receiving those benefits.

Employees claiming benefits to care for a designated person for the first time will have to identify that person and attest, under penalty of perjury, to their blood relationship or explain how their relationship is equivalent to a family relationship. Importantly, this is a state-administered benefits determination, not an invitation for employers to independently decide whether an employee’s personal relationships are sufficiently meaningful.

And employers should remember that Paid Family Leave benefits and job protection are two different things. PFL provides wage replacement. CFRA, when applicable, provides job-protected leave. One does not automatically guarantee the other.

So, Who Qualifies as “Family”?

Here’s where employers need to resist the temptation to impose their own definitions. Many of us think of family in traditional terms: parents, children, siblings, spouses, and grandparents. But modern families don’t always fit neatly into those categories.

An employee may have been raised by someone who isn’t a biological or adoptive parent. Another may have a lifelong friend who has effectively become family. Someone else may rely on a close companion for the kind of support traditionally provided by relatives. California law recognizes that meaningful family relationships aren’t always established through marriage, adoption, or biology. Does that mean employees can simply identify anyone they like and demand protected leave? No. The relationship must satisfy the applicable legal definition, and the employee must meet the relevant eligibility and medical-certification requirements.

But employers should be cautious about making assumptions based on labels or insisting on documentation of a legal or biological relationship when the law recognizes family-like relationships. The better approach is to focus on the statutory requirements, seek appropriate information through the established leave process, and avoid unnecessary inquiries into employees’ personal lives.

The Biggest Mistake Employers Can Make

The most significant risk isn’t necessarily misunderstanding the new Paid Family Leave benefits. It’s misunderstanding the protections employees already have. Imagine an employee requests time off to care for someone described as a “close friend.” The supervisor responds, “Sorry, CFRA only covers family members.” That’s potentially a serious mistake.

The proper response is to determine whether the individual qualifies as a designated person and whether the employee otherwise meets CFRA’s requirements. The same issue arises when employers rely on outdated leave forms, handbook provisions, or HR software that recognizes only traditional family relationships.

Another common mistake is assuming that approval or denial of state Paid Family Leave benefits determines whether an employer must grant protected leave. It doesn’t. Employers must evaluate their obligations under CFRA independently of the state’s benefits determination. And depending on the circumstances, other leave protections may apply as well.

What Should Employers Do Now?

Although SB 590 won’t become operative until 2028, there’s no reason to wait to address the underlying compliance issues.

Start by reviewing your CFRA policy. Does it expressly recognize “designated persons”? Does it accurately describe how employees can identify them? Are any limitations consistent with California law? Next, take a look at your leave forms and internal procedures. Employees shouldn’t have to select an inaccurate relationship category simply because the employer’s paperwork hasn’t kept up with the law. You also should train supervisors to recognize potential leave requests and refer them to HR rather than making eligibility decisions on the spot. An employee doesn’t have to use the words “CFRA” or “designated person” to raise an issue that requires further review. It is important to ensure the employees administering leaves understand the distinction between job protection and wage replacement. This will become especially important when SB 590 takes effect. Finally, review how your organization handles medical certifications and requests for additional information. Employers are entitled to obtain information permitted by law, but leave administration shouldn’t become an investigation into whether an employee’s relationships meet someone’s personal expectations.

The Bottom Line

California has been expanding its understanding of family for years, and SB 590 represents another step in that direction. The law recognizes something that employers should already understand: The people we rely on most aren’t necessarily the people we’re related to. But this isn’t simply a story about changing family structures. It’s a reminder that California’s leave laws overlap in complicated ways, and even well-intentioned employers can make expensive mistakes when they treat those laws as interchangeable.

July 2028 may seem far away. The obligation to recognize designated persons under CFRA, however, is already here.

Remember, the best time to discover that your leave policy is outdated is before an employee needs to rely on it.

The post California’s Expanding Definition of “Family” first appeared on Shaw Law Group.

      

Let’s face it. Some days, working in HR feels less like a profession and more like supervising a middle school cafeteria. Except the students have mortgages, LinkedIn profiles, and access to attorneys.

Someone is furious because a coworker didn’t invite them to lunch. A department head wants to fire an employee for having a “bad attitude” but cannot explain what that means. Two employees haven’t spoken in three weeks because of an incident involving a shared refrigerator. And the CEO wants to know why everyone can’t just get along.

Welcome to Monday. 

It’s easy to laugh at the absurdity of workplace behavior. Frankly, sometimes you have to. But underneath the drama, the personalities, and the seemingly endless parade of problems is something much more important. Every workplace needs someone willing to be the grown-up in the room.

And that person doesn’t need the fanciest title, the biggest office, or the authority to fire anyone. They just need the courage to lead.

The Courage to Be Unpopular

We spend a lot of time talking about leadership skills. Communication, emotional intelligence, conflict resolution, and strategic thinking. All important, of course. But here’s one that doesn’t get nearly enough attention: the ability to tolerate someone being unhappy with you.

Seriously. Too many workplace problems persist because someone in authority doesn’t want to have an uncomfortable conversation. They don’t want to disappoint a high performer, confront a difficult executive, or tell an employee that their behavior is unacceptable. So, they wait. And wait. And hope the problem will somehow resolve itself.

Spoiler alert: It usually doesn’t.

Instead, the problem gets bigger, employees become frustrated, and HR inherits a mess that could have been prevented six months earlier. Being a grown-up means accepting that doing the right thing won’t always make you popular. Sometimes it means telling an otherwise terrific employee that their behavior is terrible. Sometimes it means telling the CEO that the proposed solution is a very bad idea. And sometimes it means explaining, yet again, that rolling your eyes during a staff meeting is not necessarily a terminable offense.

Good leaders understand that not every uncomfortable moment is a crisis, and not every unhappy employee has been treated unfairly. They also understand that avoiding a difficult decision is itself a decision, usually one with negative consequences for everyone else.

Stop Confusing “Nice” With “Kind”

Here’s another uncomfortable truth: Being nice and being kind are not the same thing. In fact, in the workplace, they can be very different.

Being nice is avoiding a difficult conversation because you don’t want to upset someone. Being kind is having that conversation because the person deserves to know the truth. Being nice is allowing a struggling employee to continue struggling because delivering constructive criticism feels awkward. Being kind is explaining what needs to change and giving that employee a genuine opportunity to improve.

And being nice is letting the office bully continue terrorizing everyone because they’re exceptionally good at their job. Being kind is protecting the rest of the team.

We need fewer leaders focused on being liked and more leaders committed to being fair, honest, and courageous. That doesn’t mean becoming the workplace drill sergeant. You can be compassionate without being a pushover, establish boundaries without being cruel, and hold people accountable without humiliating them. In fact, the best leaders do all three.

Employees deserve honesty, even when it’s uncomfortable. They also deserve leaders who care enough to tell them what they need to hear rather than simply what they want to hear.

You Don’t Have to Attend Every Argument

Some workplace conflicts deserve serious attention. Others deserve a polite acknowledgment and a gentle reminder that the adults involved are perfectly capable of working things out themselves.

Part of good leadership is knowing the difference. Not every disagreement requires an investigation. Not every personality conflict requires mediation. And not every employee complaint calls for an emergency meeting involving HR, the CEO, and outside counsel. Sometimes two people just don’t like each other. That’s allowed. But they still have to work together professionally.

Of course, complaints involving potential harassment, discrimination, retaliation, threats, or other legal concerns must be assessed appropriately. But once those issues have been considered, leaders should resist the temptation to become permanent referees for ordinary workplace friction.

Employees are capable of learning how to disagree respectfully, solve problems, and navigate uncomfortable conversations. Sometimes the most empowering thing a leader can say is, “I have confidence that the two of you can work through this professionally.” Then give them the tools and opportunity to do exactly that.

And if someone continues to behave badly? Address it. Promptly. Professionally. Without turning the situation into a six-month committee project.

The Little Things Aren’t Little

Leadership isn’t measured only by the big decisions. It’s measured by what happens on an ordinary Wednesday, when nobody is giving a speech about organizational values.

Do you give employees credit for their ideas? Acknowledge your mistakes? Listen when someone disagrees with you? Say, “Thank you.”? Treat the employee who cleans the office with the same respect you show the person who owns the building? Follow the rules you expect everyone else to follow?

Employees notice these things. They notice who gets a pass, whose concerns are dismissed, and whether the organization’s values disappear the minute they become inconvenient. They also notice courage, humility, consistency, and generosity.

One sincere apology can repair more damage than a dozen leadership retreats. One difficult but honest conversation can change someone’s career. One leader willing to defend an employee who isn’t in the room can change an entire team’s understanding of what respect looks like.

None of this requires a new policy, an expensive consultant, or another inspirational poster featuring a mountain. It requires paying attention, treating people decently, and recognizing that leadership is something you do, not something printed on your business card.

Here’s to the People Who Keep Showing Up

Working with people can be messy, frustrating, hilarious, and occasionally downright exhausting. But it’s also incredibly meaningful.

Think about how much of our lives we spend working. Think about the influence a leader can have on someone’s confidence, financial security, health, and happiness. Think about the difference between going home every evening feeling defeated and going home knowing your contributions matter.

That’s a tremendous amount of power. And responsibility.

The good news is that you don’t have to be perfect to make a positive difference. You don’t have to have all the answers or get every decision right. You just have to keep trying to be thoughtful, fair, honest, and brave. Apologize when you get it wrong. Speak up when something isn’t right. Give people room to grow. And remember that behind every personnel file, performance review, and workplace complaint is an actual human being.

Even the one who keeps stealing lunches from the refrigerator.

At Shaw Law Group, we’ve seen just about everything when it comes to workplace behavior. We’ve seen leaders make difficult situations worse by refusing to deal with them, employees turn relatively minor disagreements into full-blown dramas, and organizations spend an astonishing amount of time and money addressing problems that never should have gotten so far. Some days, you really can’t make this stuff up.

But we’ve also had the privilege of working with some truly remarkable people. Leaders who aren’t afraid to have difficult conversations, who genuinely care about their employees, and who understand that doing the right thing sometimes means making a decision nobody is going to like. They don’t always get it right, but they take responsibility when they don’t, and they keep trying.

And here’s something we wish more people understood: You don’t have to solve every problem, make everyone happy, or have the perfect response to every ridiculous situation that lands on your desk. You just have to be willing to deal with what matters, tell people the truth, and occasionally remind actual adults that they are, in fact, actual adults.

We know how exhausting that can be. Especially when you’ve explained the same thing seventeen different ways, someone is still convinced that being asked to do their job constitutes harassment, and you have three genuinely important issues waiting for your attention.

But think about the alternative. Imagine a workplace where nobody speaks up, nobody takes responsibility, and everyone waits for someone else to handle the difficult stuff. Unfortunately, we don’t have to imagine very hard. We’ve seen those workplaces, too.

So, the next time you’re wondering whether it’s worth having that uncomfortable conversation, enforcing that unpopular decision, or pushing back when everyone else wants to take the easy way out, remember this: The problems you prevent rarely make headlines. The trust you build doesn’t show up on a spreadsheet. And the employee whose work life you made better may never tell you.

That’s okay. Do it anyway.

And if someone complains that you’re being too tough, too demanding, or not nearly sympathetic enough about the ongoing refrigerator situation, take a moment to consider whether they’re right.

Then go be the grown-up in the room.

The post Be the Grown-Up in the Room (Even When Nobody Else Is) first appeared on Shaw Law Group.